once you go black...

okay. i have a blog post for you. and no, it's not part ii of this. i'm sorry. i know. i'm a bit rubbish, aren't it? i've had numerous requests.

well, actually, fuck it. here, let me give you part ii:

his name is: leahcim. being indonesian, when he came to australia, he reversed his name to make it easier for people to pronounce.*

so now i can get on with the real blog post, right? it all started a few months ago. on a tram. it was a friday night. and i was a little drunk...

i was sitting in a seat that faces into the middle of the tram. out of the corner of my eye i could see a gorgeous boy sitting near me. not wanting to stare too much, i zoned out, played my ds and listened to my ipod. a few stops later a couple got on the tram and the woman sat next to me. she was talking to her husband/partner/whatever and yeah, they seemed kinda close but i wasn't really paying much attention. in another stop or two, the man asked if i would move (and move specifically to sit next to the super cute boy) so that he could sit next to the woman. this was actually very weird, for two reasons: i) if there was a ranking of tram seats (remember how they did that for the tube seats in london?) the seat that he was suggesting i move to was clearly the worst seat on the tram, squashed into the corner with zero leg room, and well below the standard of the seat that i was currently occupying; and ii) who ever asks anyone to move seats?! clearly these people were tourists or something.

anyway, when i sat down next to the super cute boy, i realised he smelt DIVINE! now, keep in mind that, as previously mentioned, i was a bit drunk. plus, i'd just been asked, under particularly odd circumstances, to sit next to this boy- it was fated, right?! i got out my phone and typed a message: "you smell delicious!" and then tapped him on the shoulder and showed it to him. i had mentally braced myself for an awkward 10 minute tram ride, but he laughed, got out his phone, and typed a message back to me.

to cut a long story short, i then proceeded to blatantly chat this boy up while everyone on the tram pretended not to watch. i managed to get his phone number, and i walked off the tram with a date for the following monday night. i was actually on a massive high- he was gorgeous, and i felt like i must have been super funny/amazing/smoking hot to have been able to get his number, not to mention a date. like, super-awesome, right?!

so we go for a date on monday and it was fucking fabulous. we had loads in common, we had a good time, and then we have sex. again, all good. he goes home, and he says we should do it again. i can only agree- after all, i'd had a really good time and he was gorgeous.

over the next week or two we exchange a few messages. but when i suggest we catch up again, he is cagey and says he is really busy. i have no doubt that that's true, so i be patient and wait it out. and i wait. and i wait. and i wait.

but i wait for nothing, because nothing happens. and i mean, seriously, what the fuck? in the words of macy gray: WHY DIDN'T YOU CALL ME?! i'm fucking, awesome, you idiot!! i have literally spent the last few months pondering this. what happened?

*****

months later (this morning, in fact), i finally work it out. because i see him at the organic food store with some other white girl. (i'm not even making this shit up- THE ORGANIC FOOD STORE! could you get any wankier?!) i hide. i hide up the back like the mature adult i am. i have a moment. i want to leave the store altogether, but my cupboards are seriously bare. i get my groceries and i get the fuck out.



* i) so that's it. that's the entire part ii. to be honest, i have no idea what i was originally thinking when i promised a follow up blogpost. there's really nothing more to tell. whatever idea i had for it, it has long since evaporated. but now you have his name, and that's the main thing, right?
ii) leachcim may or may not be his real name. you know, just in case that wasn't obvious.