thirty is my lucky number

of course, at some stage i do expect the list to keep growing. just not right now.

1. simon- i was 19. he was a busker. i dropped a $20 note in his guitar case. he had sex with me and then passed me around to his friends. in hindsight i'm rather glad that i never bothered to give him head.
2. dave- one of the busker's friends. sadly i did give him head. i'm sure it was rather rubbish though.
3. mondras- we met in a chatroom. he was from sydney but he came down for a friend's bucks night and ended up staying with me. his gf was not too impressed. he wanted to give me oral sex but i wouldn't let him (oh the naivety!)
4. scotsmaninmelb- another screen name (and don't ask me to remember his real name). i caught a taxi to his house in frankston. it cost me over $100 and the taxi driver couldn't read and got lost multiple times.
5. S- yeah we had sex. it was his first time. there was risotto (we used to call oral sex "risotto" which i'd actually completely forgotten about until S reminded me a few days ago.) in any case, it was my first time for that. i know he likes to think he's gotten better at it since then
6. lex- i go to sydney to meet my online friends. i stay with lex and we have sex. quite a bit of it.
7. ronan- i get bored of lex and have quite a bit of sex with ronan. i was only in sydney for five days... apparently i move fast.
8. adam- he is also from the website. my mother actually suggested to him that he should get a nose job. we were together for about 20 months. even back then i knew i couldn't deal with bad sex for the rest of my life. i was just a bit naive to realise it wasn't just bad. it was life-threateningly shocking.
9. brad- we worked together and i'd been eyeing him off whilst i was still with adam. we fucked a few times and it was semi-worth it if only for the glory points of carrying out an office romance
10. shaun- he scored some quick and dirty head from me. i wanted more, but it never eventuated. i heard that his mum passed away a few years ago and my heart bled for him
11. karma sutra boy- the man that got me pregnant, then didn't believe me. i miscarried, he kept being an asshole, and we kept having sex. yeah, one of the few men (along with simon and dave above) who i have let fuck me over. i'm not proud of this one. he was very good in bed though (as the name suggests) and the first man to make me orgasm.
12. evan- i picked him up in icon bar. he had sex with me with his socks on. he's married now, according to facebook.
13. spunky bar boy- he worked at e:fiftyfive once upon a time. we had sex in an alleyway off little collins st.
14. hot or not boy- there is a running joke between us about how this was the best seven seconds of my life. it wasn't, but he's been a good friend for a long time.
15. tanya- my first girl. my dad freaked. she was appropriately and psychotically devastated when i split up with her for kerm.
16. kerm- we met in a lesbian chat room. we were together for three years and were desperately in love for at least the first one or two. then i got bored of him
17. review guy- he was pathetic, but apparently i was desperate. it took me a month or two to wisen up. he went back to his ex. until, of course, she ditched him too. i guess we both learned something.
18. mng- hot or not boy and i seduced her every monday night for a summer. i was in love with hot or not boy, and mng was just along for the ride. not that i was complaining. i went down on her in the bathroom at a party whilst people were queuing outside and listening to her moan.
19. dj- this was a mistake that i wouldn't have made has i been in a better place. we went out for nine long and painful months. i cried for another three when it ended. the sex was sub-optimal.
20. ben- he was 19 and reminded me all too much of my younger brother. we had sex under the blankets whilst his friends slept in the same hotel room. he rang me every day for the next week just to make sure that i wasn't pregnant.
21. jake- a one night stand from eurotrash. i realised he had a gf when he had to leave at 4 in the morning to "go and rescue his little sister who was drunk and sick in king st".
22. A1- he came, he saw, he conquered (which is, i'm sure, exactly as he would see it.) in reality, i decided to move to london for my own reasons which definitely did not include mediocre sex (except for the bathroom floor at the airport which was fairly memorable.)
23. strange penis guy- he had a strange penis and i'm still not sure exactly what was wrong with it. i didn't hang around to find out, either
24. luke- quite possibly the worst root on the dance floor at barry's.
25. number 3- see the thing is, A1 and i had a competition between him leaving melbourne, and me arriving in london. the winner was the person who had sex with the most people (hey, we're classy.) i know i won- 7:3, but i'm fucked if i can remember who number three was. still, i'm sure he thinks about me every night before he goes to bed.
26. N- if you've read this blog at all, you'll know.
27. osg- *sigh* need i even say more? he's still excellent. with his tongue, with his hands. and he's pretty damn good with the whip too.
28. vsg- this one thinks of me, i'm sure of it.
29. mansion boy- he tried to hook up with me again afterwards you know.